(The italicised lines are the title of a book by Terence Blacker about his friend, Willy Donaldson.)
Last night I took my life apart
And threw it on the fire.
I stirred the ashes of my heart
Still smouldering on the pyre
And heard a voice within the fire
Cry out in bitterness:
You cannot live as I have lived
And not end up like this.
Last night I measured out my days
And hid them in the earth.
I measured them a thousand ways
Weighing what they were worth
And heard a voice beneath the earth
Cry out from the abyss:
You cannot live as I have lived
And not end up like this.
Last night I bundled up my past
And lugged it to the lake.
Such a sad farce from first to last
And such a big mistake!
I whispered to the listening lake
As cruel as a kiss:
You cannot live as I have lived
And not end up like this.
Prince, are you there? The thickening air
Begins to smoke and hiss:
You cannot live as I have lived
And not end up like this.