In a parallel universe far, far away, a Treasurer rises to his feet, tells the truth and pledges to make honesty and competence his touchstones from now on. The full address, along with entertaining reader comments, is at Catallaxy Files, but the excerpt below captures its penitent essence:
….Tonight’s budget is one of repair and rebirth.
In past budgets I promised a surplus, which I could never deliver and never intended to deliver.
That’s because I kept on spending. I couldn’t help myself. Taxpayers’ money was like a drug – I couldn’t get enough.
Tonight that spree will stop. And reverse.
There are no new policies tonight. No new regulations. No new agencies. There have been far too many over the past five years.
Madam Speaker, tonight I announce the following:
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Cutting Australia’s aid budget by 75 per cent in real terms from 1 July 2013
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Writing off and exiting the NBN, a disastrous policy created by Mr Kevin Rudd.
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Adopting John Howard’s policy for border control.
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Abolishing the following departments and agencies, effective 1 July 2013 which already function at the State level or which are unnecessary and interfere with private sector activities:
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the Australian Broadcasting Corporation
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the Australian Communications and Media Authority
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the Australian Curriculum, Assessment and Reporting Authority
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the Australian Film, Television and Radio School
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the Australian Human Rights Commission
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the Australian Institute for Teaching and School Leadership
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the Australian Safeguards and Non-Proliferation Office
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the Australian Skills Quality Authority
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the Australian Sports Anti-Doping Authority
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the Australian Trade Commission
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the Australian Wine and Brandy Corporation
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the Clean Energy Regulator
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the Coal Mining Industry (Long Service Leave Funding) Corporation
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the Commonwealth Ombudsman
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the Commonwealth Scientific and Industrial Research Organisation
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the Department of Education, Employment and Workplace Relations, will become the Department of Workplace Relations, with all other function shut down
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the Department of Broadband, Communications and the Digital Economy
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the Department of Climate Change and Energy Efficiency
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the Department of Families, Housing, Community Services and Indigenous Affairs
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Department of Sustainability, Environment, Water, Population and Communities.
Other departments and agencies too will either be abolished or slashed to the bone ….